Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts

Friday, September 8, 2017

And then there were seven.

He was just one week shy of turning twenty and already serving in the Air Force
stationed in South Carolina when I came along.


He came home as often as he could but South Carolina soon became his permanent home.
My first memories of him, although somewhat faint due to the fact that I was only three or four,
was when he would pick me up, balance me in the palm of one big hand
and extend me up to the ceiling, all the while chanting, "Way up high! Way up high!
I can also remember Mom offering this warning..."Now, Bob, you be careful with her!!"
Funny thing is, later on he performed this trick many times with his own three little girls.
~*~
 I remember looking forward with great anticipation to his arrival when we were expecting a visit.
You could find me perched at the window that faced the end of our road throughout the day,
not putting into perspective the 13+ hour drive it took to make it to Ohio.
What does a little kid know about perspective, anyway?
~*~
 Back then I called him Bobby and he called me Little Sis.
Later on, he was just Big Brother and I was Dee-bor-AHHH.
He had a nickname for just about everyone and mine was his quite unique interpretation of Deborah.
The name stuck with me all throughout my life and if he would have felt up to it,
I'm sure he would have called me that when I saw him a few weeks ago.



Judging by the shirt (and the wallpaper) this photo was surely taken the same day as the first one.
These are my other two brothers, Jerry on the guitar and Doug on the fiddle.
Music has played a huge part in our lives and you could always find a collection
 of stringed instruments stashed here and there throughout the house.
They say it all began with our dad although the only instrument I ever heard him play
was the harmonica, which he called the french harp.



Fast forward to what looks like the 70's (above) and sometime in the 80's (below).



This is one thing the Billheimer brothers were kind of famous for...well, maybe not exactly famous.
Now, I don't know how to play either one of these but I can only imagine how difficult it might be to strum someone else's guitar with one hand and chord another's mandolin with your other hand...
...all at the same time!


The video above was taken several years ago at one of our reunions.
They really all can sing quite well but this is just an example of their crazy shenanigans.



Group photos through the years...






He wasn't able to be with us for the past two reunions.
Cancer that he thought was behind him returned, this time with vengeance.
He fought the good fight until he just wasn't able to fight anymore.


Last Wednesday, August 30, his three beautiful daughters were given the gift
of singing him into glory.


It's really kind of difficult to wrap my brain around—losing a sibling.
I've tried to imagine what it would be like, especially since all of us are getting up there.
Although, due to miles, we weren't able to be together as often as we would have liked, 
our moments together as a family were such blessed times.
~*~
Over the past several weeks I am learning that one of the greatest losses in life
surely must be the death of a brother or sister...
 ...and many of us will have to face the loss of a sibling more than once.
Our siblings share many of the same memories and family history 
and when one of them passes away, 
they take one of our connections to the past with them.


My family and I miss him so very much already, 
yet we are rejoicing that he is with the One that he had served for so many years.

So we are always confident, even though we know that as long as we live in these bodies we are not at home with the Lord. For we live by believing and not by seeing. Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord.
2 Corinthians 5:6-8
~*~
So I want to say "thank you" for the sweet and kind words of condolence
and particularly for the prayers for me and my family.
You all are the best.

Much love,

Monday, March 23, 2015

Saying Goodbye

The past several days have been a whirlwind.
I'm still trying to take it all in as I look at his sweet photo...
...it seems like a movie that I just watched or a dream I just had.



We lost our sweet Hunter last Wednesday evening.
He was a tiny puppy when he came to us...about 9 weeks old.
~
The week had been stressful enough...
...we were due to fly to Jim's sister's home in Destin, Florida the next day.
I had almost everything packed up, including all of the dog paraphernalia for the kennel.
Just as I was able to sit and catch my breath for a moment, Hunter became very listless
and suddenly began having what looked like a grand mal seizure.
He had never had a seizure before that I know of.
~
We were noticing more and more that he was beginning to show his age.
He would have turned thirteen in September...
...but even though he seemed to be failing a bit—having good days and bad,
it had been a good day for him...eating, playing, running, etc.
~
I could have never imagined how the evening would end.
 Around 9:00 PM I found him cowering in the hallway.
I picked him up and he immediately started flailing about and crying out.


As everything started to unfold, my mind began racing with thoughts,
knowing we had airline tickets and couldn't cancel our trip...
...but at the same time, where would we board a sick dog?
And how could we even leave him anywhere in good conscience?
~
I googled seizures in dogs and read that they can be quite common,
 and most of the time the dog will recover quickly as if nothing had happened.
This was my prayer and hope for Hunter.
But God had another plan.
~
Eleven o'clock would find me lying on the couch and cradling him,
wrapped up like a baby on my chest, watching him breathe his final breath.
As I write these words five day later, it is all just so surreal.
Hunter had lived his last day.
But God's timing is never wrong, in fact it is perfect.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.    Isaiah 55:8-9


This was Hunter's favorite thing.
~
With heavy hearts, we boarded our plane for Destin.
I'll share more about our trip later.
~
So since I haven't read a blog for nearly a week,
I must now try to get caught up!

Sharing at:
Mosaic Monday
Roses of Inspiration
 

Friday, October 25, 2013

Bittersweet


Last Friday while we visiting with our family at the cabin, I got an early morning call from my sister. I figured the news probably wasn't going to be good since the night before when she had texted me, the message was that our precious aunt, our deceased mother's only living sister, probably wasn't going to make it through the night. Aunt Clara had just celebrated her 103rd birthday on Labor Day of this year and was doing well at the time. She had gotten sick very quickly. Just as I had assumed, she told me the news of her passing. My first response was one of sadness, of course, which was mostly for her family.

When you have lived so long for the Lord, and you are 103, it's a little hard to be sad for too long when you know they are in the presence of Jesus. And her mother and father. And her brother and four sisters! Oh, what a happy reunion was going on in heaven that day! This photo as you can see was taken three years ago at her 100th Birthday party. Wasn't she just the cutest thing?



Although I was thoroughly enjoying the weekend with our son from Nashville and all of grands, there was a tinge of sadness that would creep in every now and then. I thought about Aunt Clara's children, all seven of them still living. I prayed that God would comfort them in their loss.

As we turned onto the road leading back to the cabin after our family outing, I saw something I hadn't seen in a very, very long time. A bittersweet vine had taken over a small tree that sat right beside the road. I have never seen any of it in the entire eleven years that we have had the cabin, plus we had just been there two weeks before and as always, I had been up and down the road several times taking photos. I had not seen it.


Out of curiosity, I was looking up some definitions of bittersweet and this is the first one I found.

The definition of bittersweet is a combination of both bitter and sweet, or an emotional feeling that is a mixture of both happy and sad.adjective.

Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints.     Psalm 116:15

I won't even try to figure this out...I'm just going to accept it as a special blessing from my Father and be thankful for His almighty omnipotence and omnipresence.  I love it when He reminds me that His timing is perfect.




I'm sharing with:

http://bloggerspirit.blogspot.com/2013/10/praise-update-on-design-gives-back.html
http://www.create-with-joy.com/2013/10/inspire-me-monday-week-95.html
http://www.thebeautyinhisgrip.com/2013/10/sharing-his-beauty-linky_27.html
http://www.dwellings-theheartofyourhome.com/2013/10/amaze-me-monday-30.html
http://myfreshlybrewedlife.com/2013/10/weekend-brew-day-26-redeemed-free-printable.html
http://whatjoyismine.net/mondays-musings-84-fear/
http://www.astrollthrulife.net/2013/10/188th-inspire-me-tuesday.html
http://www.adelightsomelife.com/2013/10/a-return-to-lovelines.html
http://ivyandelephants.blogspot.com/2013/10/feast-or-famine.html
http://www.savvysouthernstyle.net/2013/10/wow-us-wednesdays-142.html
http://jannolson.blogspot.com/2013/10/share-your-cup-thursday-79.html
http://www.deeprootsathome.com/encourage-one-another-wednesday-link-up-110/
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